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space marine grocery shopping

contemporary videogames are filled with hulking, wide-shouldered, thick-limbed, mansteak protagonists, men whose bodies ripple with beef. how does one of these fat hams, these enormous man-warriors, live his daily life? how does he, for example, fit in a grocery store?

it was this question that inspired my klik of the month game this month: space marine grocery shopping. help this hulking brute retrieve a carton of eggs and take it to the checkout counter without smashing too many groceries with your enormous bulk. this game features what i think are called “tank controls,” which means it’s like trying to navigate a grocery store with a tank.


  1. John H. wrote:

    I call tank controls the two vertical lever setup used in Battlezone and Vindicators. One joystick controls the left tread, one the right.

    To go forward, it’s up on both. To execute a turn, it’s up on one. To turn in place, up on one and down on the other. You can do all these things in reverse too.

    It’s an awesome control scheme that gives players more movement options, but at the cost of having to master the controls.

    Anyway though… yeah, those ultra-ripped star-army types have infested gaming since at least the days of Doom.

    5/22/2011 at 1:21 pm | permalink
  2. Django Durango wrote:

    Minotaur China Shop is kinda like this, gameplay-wise, in that you are a bulky, not particularly coordinated character and you have to navigate around delicate objects without breaking them.

    5/23/2011 at 10:32 am | permalink
  3. Prio wrote:

    wtb mouselook controls

    5/23/2011 at 3:33 pm | permalink

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